I am a Twitter freak - I simply love it. I threw out a question to my network of friends there to try to convince my mother to join Twitter. And, the following are the reasons they gave.If you’ve ever wondered if social media online is for you, maybe these reasons are something you need to hear also!

Want to join in the fun? Post!!

	wordvixen @SmartWoman *lol* I was on it at her house once. She kept refreshing the page to see if anyone responded to her “being all a-twitter”.
	BeckyMcCray @SmartWoman My mom is the amazing @maesz ! She’s in and out on Twitter.
	lisisilveira @SmartWoman where can I find them???
	wordvixen @SmartWoman My mother is addicted to my Twitter account. Trying to get her her own.
	berriesweetest @SmartWoman I will tweet when I think of more.
	BeckyMcCray @SmartWoman Um… My mom does Twitter.
	berriesweetest @SmartWoman 9) “tweet ur own bizness!”. Mom joins twitter and keeps cyber-track of adult daughter.
	mommyaulait @SmartWoman life is just funnier in 140 characters or less
	berriesweetest @SmartWoman 10) it’s a conversation starter when you say, “she’s learned to tweet” and people wonder if you have a speech impediment.
	jhofheins @SmartWoman re top 10: So you can waste your day away, 140 characters at a time.
	writingroads @SmartWoman One of the Top 10 reasons why your mom should use Twitter: Because you can block anyone that talks back, is mean or untidy.
	PublicityHound @SmartWoman One more way for mom to tell you to do something and remind you “because I’m your mother.”
	DazzlinDonna @SmartWoman Cuz mom can snoop on daughter’s private life - legally!
	TheNewService @SmartWoman My Mom joined! #10 So you can keep up with your daughter’s thoughts all day long! (Every mom’s dream, right?)
	Coach_Ferfer @SmartWoman top 10 for mom 2 join twitter - a long distance hug is just as good as the real thing
	Coach_Ferfer @SmartWoman top 10 for mom 2 join twitter - she can keep closer tabs on you; can nag even from long distance; won’t c u rolling eyes at her

	jinglis @smartwoman 9. short notes from mom are better than long ones. 10. she can tweet at all hours and not wake you up. (i’m a friend of julie’s)
	15MinutesADay @SmartWoman top 10 reasons “why your Mom should join Twitter”: To keep an eye on your little girl & who she hangs out with…
	jinglis @smartwoman 7. it’ll keep her off the rest of the scary internet. 8. she has to do something other than MySpace
	jinglis @smartwoman 5. she can keep in touch with all her peeps in one place that way. 6. no better way to find out where the party’s at
	jinglis @smartwoman 3. because she’s sitting in front of the computer anyway - give her something to read! 4. it has to be better than sudoku
	jinglis @SmartWoman 1. because she needs to know what you’re doing every minute of the day. 2. because you need to know what she’s doing too

I don’t know about you, but referrals and recommendations work on me. When someone I trust, either a friend, family member, or someone I recognize as an expert recommends a business, I usually check it out. Especially in areas of wide choice, huge variation in service levels, and many substitute alternatives, I ask my friends what they choose, whether it’s light hearted stuff like a hairdresser or restaurant or more serious stuff like a physician or preschool for my niece.

I often go in with a softer attitude toward performance, too. I cut them slack. And, when they don’t need any slack and perform well, it rates double. And, not only does the business get a gold star, but so does the friend who recommended them. It all works together to strengthen my trust and deepen my relationship with all involved. I go in expecting greatness rather than wondering if I’ll get it.

To use testimonials and referrals to strengthen your business relationships, here are some helpful hints:

1. Ask directly
Nothing goes farther than simply asking. And, be sure to be polite but direct.

If you are looking for more clients, ask your current clients during the process, rather than after. To understand why this particular timing is important, you need to understand a scientific phenomenon called “morphic convergence”. In basic terms, it’s why when you are beginning to shop for a Prius (or even just start to think actively about starting to shop for a Prius) you begin to notice Prius cars all over the place when you never noticed them before. And, you start meeting other people by happenstance that are also looking to buy a Prius. Your mental focus brings these things into view for you, or converges on that idea.

The approach then is to use the power of your client’s morphic convergence experience to help you. If they are looking to buy your product, they have probably met others who are too. Waiting until after the sale or process means your client will meet more people who just bought their Prius rather than are looking to buy, which doesn’t really help you, right?

Ask for an introduction to anyone they know who they feel could use your services. Include in your introductory meeting with clients that you work mainly by referral. Tell them that you would rather spend money serving the loyal clients you have better than on advertising looking for new clients. Timing is everything. You don’t want to ask for a referral before that new client even knows what you’re about, but it can happen sooner than you probably think or are completely comfortable initiating at this point. Just ask and it will feel more and more comfortable to you as you practice it. Find your groove and it will come back to you in good will and increased sales.

2. Set up an incentive program
Reward your clients with recognition, gifts, discounts, your unfettered time, or other courteous and thoughtful gestures.

It doesn’t have to cost much, as you will find that the human touch goes a long way. People don’t refer their friends to make money, in general. They are being kind and helpful. Responding in equally motivated ways magnifies that and does more for a relationship than money. Money is nice, but giving a gift rather than offering a discount sets the stage for maintaining your price points as well as building trust and rapport.

One thing you can do here: if you have a progression of products that you sell, for example beginner, intermediate, and advanced levels, giving a gift that moves the referring client to your next level of products in addition to recognizing their generosity for referring can increase your business in more than one way. That’s great for everyone.

Another idea is to partner with other businesses that can refer back to you when developing client gift ideas. If you sell birthday cakes, include a free helium rental coupon for balloons from a florist gift shop. The client will have to pick up the helium canister and is likely to buy the fancy balloons at the same time. And, give the florist gift shop a gift offer they can give away. Be sure to make it a real gift though rather than a thinly disguised sale offer or it won’t work. But, don’t you think that client will always call you for cakes when they get such great service? Of course they will!

3. Be consistent and make it easy and fun to participate
Adding more positive experience and doing so consistently emphasizes further the advantages of interacting with you and your business.

Setting up a call-in audio testimonial line and then featuring the referring client and their business on your website or in your newsletter is a fun way to show your appreciation. People love talking about and hearing themselves, and it is so sincere and believable. And it establishes further reciprocity - you do something for them, they do something for you, you do something for them, and so on and so on.

If you are a blogger or website owner, review and recommend someone else’s site that would be helpful to your core clients and then send an email to that site’s owner with a link to your review. They are likely to refer back to you. Sometimes referrals come after you’ve given first, so be generous with your information and expertise. It will pay off.

Don’t pretend that sending a cute birthday card to your insurance clients is going to ensure you referrals. I always laugh out loud when I get an overly personal message from someone who, frankly, isn’t that overly personal with me in actuality. Consistent contact is usually better than no contact, but make the contact count. Pick up the phone for example. Even a phone message just saying hello, or inviting them to a client appreciation wine tasting, or checking on someone for no particular reason at all carries weight. Pretending you know them enough to send them a personal greeting doesn’t.

Many service providers I work with only work with referral clients. They don’t advertise, they don’t discount, and they don’t take on clients they don’t like. They don’t have to because they have implemented a referral strategy that gives them everything they need. If you try it, you might like it.

Together, we are stronger.
Vicki Flaugher, the original SmartWoman

If you are like me, you are passionate about what you do and you like to have others into it too. For me, I am quite an advocate. I like talking about investing, entrepreneurship, passive income, internet marketing, empowerment, female power, organic living…you name it. If it’s something I believe in, and it’s changed my life in a positive way, I like to spread the word.

But, this approach isn’t the way to go when you are working to acquire new business. Although it’s important to communicate the benefits of your products and services, if you’re having to convince the client, to push, to manipulate with fancy sales technique, you don’t have the sale. And, you probably don’t want it even if you do finally “win” it. Here’s why:

The people you have to convince are the hardest to sell, the most expensive to service, and are the most likely to want a refund. You’ll work your tail off for them and then they won’t refer you to their friends. Or, worst still, they will refer their friends. Since the old adage “Birds of a feather flock together” often rings true, their friends are going to be like them– a pain in your balance sheet! Convincing just doesn’t pay and it isn’t the way business is done anymore.

Advertising and marketing have changed a lot in the last decade. People’s buying behavior has changed too. They concentrate on relationships even more and they don’t buy things that they don’t already know. When was the last time you bought a book or went to a movie with little idea of what you’d be getting? It was a long time ago for me. More to the point, when was the last time you paid more for a product because you knew and trusted the vendor? I did that yesterday, was happy to do it, and I would do it again today.

It’s not that I don’t buy new inventive products. When I do, it’s because I was educated about them first. The business owner took the time to be in the market, teaching me what their product was and what it does and how it works. Even though their idea was brand new, when I finally bought, my relationship with them was not.

I’m not saying I am immune to great sales technique. None of us are. I tend to study it and admire it. But it’s not why I buy. I don’t buy because some slick salesperson knew the right “close”. Sales technique shouldn’t get in your way, but the quality of the product and the relationship drives the sale, not the sales technique.

So, what does this mean to you? Get yourself out in the market ahead of your sales pitch! Give people ample opportunity to know you and learn about your product. Educate, communicate, give people a way to learn about you prior to even contacting you (your website’s a great tool for this). Get involved in your community so your reputation preceeds you. And protect and enrich that reputation with great service and honest dealings.

If you do these things, people will come to you and they will be great clients. When you approach them, they will already know you and will be glad to see you. They’ll be a raving fan that insist their friends should deal with only you. They will buy more often, in larger amounts, and be a breeze to service. They might even become your friend. They will already be convinced from the start because they had the opportunity to be convinced by the person whose opinion they respect the most–themselves.

When you finally embrace the power of the relationship, you’ll be out of the convincing business too.